Tag Archives: reality

An Unexpected Awakening

I’ve heard this repeated throughout my life, only now does it make sense!

Live your passion.

I received that message a few days ago. The message didn’t come from my Dragonfly Teacher or from El Juglador. Rather, it came from something deep within me, something that came from a higher source.

I know I haven’t revealed this much about myself here because, really, I don’t think it’s that big a deal. I think anyone and everyone has the ability to connect with and talk to beings from what we deem “The Other Side.”

A year and a half ago, as my journey into this was beginning, my guides had me construct a covered bridge between this reality and the next into my meditation space. <https://thedragonflysstudent.com/2013/12/28/a-little-piece-of-heaven/#more-651&gt;

The reason for the bridge, they said, was to illustrate how the magic-trick for so long reserved to psychics can be universal. On that bridge, I met, among others, my grandparents, my Beloved, and the angels who urged me to fly cross country to visit a Facebook friend. (*I say they in reference to the beings I feel are my guide, but, in truth, the guides are one, yet all. They are me, yet God. It just makes it easier to accept if I claim multiple versus the Creator, which makes me feel heretical!)

Now back to the recent message that opened my eyes.

The question that preceded that answer was thrown out in frustration – In this whole mixed-up world of haves, have-nots, and the searching, how can normal people learn to survive well?

The answer was quick, and repetitive. I got it half a dozen times that night, then more the next day as I was doing some random reading on the Internet. I was researching the Hopi End Times prophecy, which I find fascinating, (more on that some other time.) Here’s the web site where the reference originates: <http://www.v-j-enterprises.com/hopigrey.html&gt;

In fact, your medicine is your passion. (If) Your medicine always makes you feel high while dancing, then dancing is your medicine. If you feel high while cooking, then cooking is your medicine. Your medicine will always help to cure that which ails you.

Your medicine will always give you the power to rise up and continue. (This medicine is of the spirit) Your medicine is also that which you do. Your conduct in the Land of Living Things, what you do is your signature in life and it is your medicine. How your treat others and how you react to the world is your medicine. (http://www.v-j-enterprises.com/hopigrey.html)

The most brutal truth in that paper is simple – that which is your power could be another’s poison.

What does that mean to you and me, you ask?

Simple. Let’s go back to high school, for a second. You’re a senior, suffering from a fatal case of Senioritis, when your parents sit you down and ask you what you want to do with your life. It’s time to decide about college. Your dreams, however, aren’t realistic, they say. There aren’t many jobs available for Video Game Designers or Rock Stars. Instead, they suggest law degree or a civil engineer. Yes, some people want to be lawyers or civil engineers, but others want to be bakers or candle-stick makers instead of being stuck in a high-rise cubicle.

For me, it was easy, I loved writing, but I wanted to study music and be a famous singer. I auditioned and was accepted into the University of Miami Music program, and then my mom’s cousin pulled me aside (at the request of my grandfather, I think.)

I’m paraphrasing here, because my memory is hazy on the specifics, but “What careers are there for musicians who don’t make it?” he asked.

I fought and stood up for my dreams and my choices. I mean, really, this was my life, who was he to make me second-guess my dreams?

But some time that summer I caved and switched my major to a nice, respectable journalism degree. (Hah! That certainly got me far before the degradation of the 4th Estate of journalism launched me into my second career as a teacher.)

Here’s where this “Live your passion” philosophy comes into play for me.

If we are truly living our passion, doing what we’ve always wanted to do, we won’t care how much money we make or where we live, because our joy is in ourselves and our daily existence.

It took me 30 years to finally come to terms with that.

Now, I’m a writer who makes no money from my writing while former classmates of mine rake in awards and publishing deals. But I am ecstatic. My writing is beholding to no one and my life is completely in my own hands.

I’m finally living my passion.

I ask you all to take a deep look at your lives and see where your own passion lies. Then, love yourself enough to research how you can make it your own reality.

Good luck, my friends.

The Dragonfly’s Student

Love yourself first!

I’ll say this up front: Be proud and speak out loud. That is one of the most important lessons I’ve learned. This is my life, not yours.

I just don’t understand why people doubt themselves and cower through their reality. Why do they question the decisions they made in the past? Why are they insecure about the way they look? I mean, I guess I understand. I guess I was there once, in their shoes, trudging through a life that didn’t understand me. But just because I understand now doesn’t mean it needs to be that way.

People doubt because they’re forever trying to live up to what others expect. Many of us are just trying to “Keep up with the Joneses” or simply to know that the Joneses might want to be like us one day.

You know what? It doesn’t matter.

Think of it. What about that old American idiom, Keeping up with the Joneses, is so true that it gets updated in the modern era to Keep up with the Kardashians? What is so glorious about the lives of your next-door neighbor, as the original idiom implies?

The Joneses, that fictitious all-American family that was so happy in the 50s, are a lie. Dad, who works at that respectable insurance company, and Mom, the stay-at-home who is always available when her kids need her, do not live the lives others expect. They have become expert at showing only the side of their lives that others would envy.

What if that fictitious family that appears to embody perfection in their annual Christmas picture cards is not the perfection you think? What if the family picture with the daughter in the ironed dress and the son with his hair pulled back was staged?

Imagine this reality: What if daughter Sally is a tomboy who prefers torn up jeans and thrift store T-shirts rather than the ruffled pink party dresses grandma buys her? And what if son Timmy wears his dirty-blonde hair in corn rows down his back and spends his afternoons ripping through a set in his best friend’s garage with his band? Does that mean that the Joneses cannot be happy?

I’m offering to hand you, my reader, a pair of glasses that will help cut through the illusion for you. The illusion of perfection that hovers just outside the reach for most of us is a lie. The truth is, you can be happy without perfection. There is no cookie-cutter recipe for happiness. It is personal.

What if the Joneses, who are not the family you believe they are, are still happy?

Happiness exists in the person who does not care what others think. Mom Jones understands this. She adores her life and her kids and does not mind their idiosyncrasies. She is no longer stay-at-home. Instead, she has taken a low-paying job as a family counselor with the clinic across town and she helps others get past the obstacles they have created to their own joy.

And Dad Jones leaves for work at six in the morning so that he can escape during the day to take his aging father on a daily walk on the beach before he returns to his office.

Come to think of it, maybe we should be striving to keep up with these Joneses! But that is only true because they are happy in a life that is truly their joy, not the joy others expect.

I think I know the answer to some of these questions. To truly be happy with our lives, we have to love ourselves first and foremost. I know some people may throw the bible at me and say that nowhere does it say we have to love ourself, but I disagree. In Matthew 22, Jesus was asked what he believed is the greatest commandment.

“ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”

Loving your neighbor as yourself is not coveting your neighbor’s life – as implied by the Joneses idiom – it is loving your neighbor. This is also implying that you love yourself, because we can’t love others if we don’t love ourselves first.

Sometimes I wonder what people think about my life. What did they used to think about me before and what do they think has happened now that a tent and a campfire are part of my joy?

Maybe they think I’ve mentally lost it because I took myself out of the Keeping-up-with-the-Joneses reality. Maybe I have lost it, but my happiness is not dependent on what other people desire or expect.

Recently, I’ve heard from people who wish they could be where I was this summer – on Mount Shasta or in the desert on the Hopi reservation or on a lonely mountaintop in Colorado.

“No, you don’t,” I want to say.

My happiness is not their happiness. They would probably not be comfortable in a pay-as-you-shower bathing facility or with a Porta Potty existence and with living out of a suitcase in the back of an SUV. How about those well-manicured hands I used to wear so proudly? Those are gone. Would you like that? Yes, I lost fifteen pounds. That’s because I was moving more and not eating very much.

But I am happy. That is true. I am happy because I am living my happiness, not searching for someone else’s. If I make a mistake, it will be my mistake that I will proudly accept because it is my life I am living, not some faceless Jones existence.

I am human, though. I am saddened when I my friends inadvertently cower into their existence because it’s not the one they think others would respect.

I want to reach through the time-space that separates us, pull them into a 20-second hug and help them accept that their reality is perfect as long as it’s perfect for them.

I say again: Be Proud and Speak Out Loud, because, as the kids say, You Only Live (this life) Once. Make it an amazing one!

Much love to you, my friends.

The Dragonfly’s Student

Day 11, Just Passing Through

Every town I stop at teaches me something new. Yesterday, I had Cincinnati Skyline Chili, an interesting blend of flavors on a bed of spaghetti. It was the epitome of fast food – we placed the order and five minutes later the plate was place in front of me, along with a bowl of soda crackers.

It was an interesting taste, but I’m not against trying new things, obviously! And that’s what I’m learning about myself on this trip. There is nothing on this Earth that isn’t a learning experience and worthy of my attention. Even the traffic through Cincinnati and its suburbs was an experience I wouldn’t trade the world for.

As I told my new “friends” in New Orleans a few days ago, I’m just a traveler passing through. Just experiencing and learning and growing. My soul is expanding with each new day.

I’m learning that there is nothing to fear. Like, really. Nothing to fear. The other night, a creature stood on the other side of my tent and growled. I’d been awake and I watched as Minnah silently bolted upright. The creature growled again. It was level with my head. If I’d wanted to, I could have pushed the tent toward it. Instead, I waited. It growled again. Minnah barked. It growled again, and I waited. The standoff continued.

Grabbing my flashlight, I shot the beam toward the creature, then moved it around the area. After a few minutes, the creature lost his nerve and plodded away through the underbrush into the Florida wilderness. I thanked Minnah for being such a great watchdog, gave her a kiss, and fell asleep. During the full, maybe, five to seven minute standoff, I had not been afraid. I knew I was safe.

That security gave me power over the night and over the creature.

The thing is, we all have that power. There is no need to fear. We are all built in the likeness of God, if the bible is to be believed. We are all powerful beings and we create our own realities. Why, then, would we want to create a reality full of fear?

My power is stronger than any rifle or any Taser gun.

My power is more real than any towering cypress tree or vibrant river.

My power has been given to me, to all of us, by the creator of us all.

My reality is magnificent, and I’m going to continue manifesting it because I’m just another being passing through this reality called Earth.

Create a magnificent reality, my friends.

Much love,

The Dragonfly’s Student


My new friends from New Orleans, Mitch from t Honkey Tonkin’ Donkeys and Bryan from The Creole Gardens bed & breakfast.


I Want To Be Good


Like an angry rock star, sometimes I want to scream and pull my hair out.

“What am I doing?” I say to no one, or maybe to everyone. “Somebody help me. Somebody guide me. What should I do?”

When my faith is strong, I know my beloved teachers are listening to me and guiding me from just the other side of the veil. My faith is not always that strong when the realities of this world weigh heavy on me. At those times, I want to run away.

I light the incense and the candles, and then I revert to the classic prayers of my childhood before opening the dialog. And like the good Catholic girl who still lives in my heart, I fall to my knees and beg for guidance. I want to do good. I want to follow this inner compass beating deep within my soul, but the yoke of expectations is choking me.

Why can’t the answers be fed to me, like some spiritual telegraph.

That’s not how it works, I know is their answer. The answer to my doubt has to come from myself. That’s the only way this “Free Will” thing works. I need to make my own decisions based on what feels right and strong in my heart.

Sometimes, though, other voices speak louder than my heart — not mysterious voices from the great beyond or the dark unknown. Voices that sound oddly like things I used to say when I thought I had the answers. That’s what makes it tough. That’s what makes me wonder what is guiding me and if I’m doing the right thing.

At the end of the day, though, the love of my teachers shows me the way, but, many times, I still scream.

And yet still, I have faith,


The Dragonfly’s Student



Seven Days

Seven days. Sometimes, a lifetime can be lived in seven days. From beginning to end, and those can be glorious days.

While dragonflies like my teacher live longer, some butterflies may only live a week. For God, in the legends of the bible, it only took seven days to create our world. And sometimes we think time is too short for us. How many opportunities have we set aside because we believed there wasn’t enough time?

Let me tell you, seven days is an eternity.

“But I’m not God,” is the complaint of many. That’s an excuse. Success is hidden in the depths of our own reality.

Imagine a time when you don’t put limits on your abilities. Imagine a life where you are powerful enough to create the world you’d love to live. And imagine a world where you claimed victory in seven days.

A fantasy, you say? Perhaps. But in that fantasy I am the winner and I am giddy.

All I am saying today is that time is irrelevant if you live your authentic truth in those seven days, if you live the you that is real and resides in your heart, deadlines and end-dates become incidental. The Law of Attraction can only bring you what you want.

Give it a shot, I dare you. Live the next seven days as if they were your last. Go where your heart takes you. Sing what your heart sings. Love what you want to love. Be who you want to be. And move forward, never backward.

I wonder what you will find.

Now have a little fun with Sting’s romantic comedy in seven days!

With all my love,

The Dragonfly’s Student

Back to Reality

Now that I’ve left that amazing university in my mind and returned to Earth 3D, circa 2014, I’m wondering if maybe there’s a way back. Seriously, the lessons were so much easier without the doubts and limitations of this amnesia we live here.

The latest bomb to drop I learned at two this morning. Depression is a sign of spiritual awakening. F#&! …

That is so NOT cool. Here I am, Patty Pollyanna driving my happy mobile to spread peace, love and joy to all of humanity. Then this dark, Hummer-sized boulder drops in the middle of the road and I slam into it in a brutal head-on collision.

It’s like I’m in an avalanche sometimes, but every boulder I run into fades from memory until the next one. This amnesia is chronic!

This morning, panicked that I’m going to have to get on a chemical solution for my mood swings, my friends (the ones in Spirit who are awake at 2 a.m.!) inspired me to search for “depression and spiritual.”

That’s when I learned the deep, dark secret. Sure, many of us are searching to join Earth in her ascension to the 5th dimension. That’s awesome and all. But, damn, it’s not easy AT ALL. One of the sites I clicked on, Ascension Symptoms at http://www.ascensionsymptoms.com/, pretty much laid it out for me.

The list is expansive, and many of the symptoms can be explained away as other things, but many of them can’t.

For example, last year, as I was preparing for the new school year of 2012-13, I bent over to pick up a piece of paper in my classroom. I’m a healthy person. I’ve actually run a few 5K races, but when I stood up that day my heart started racing and wouldn’t stop. The palpitations continued even after sitting still and yoga breathing. Forty-five minutes later, I drove myself to the clinic where it was suggested that I go to the hospital. In the hospital, they did two days’ worth of tests and they came up with — nothing. My heart is healthy as a horse’s. Since then, I’ve done research.

Yeah, you got it. Palpitations are an awakening symptom. This has happened twice since then, but now that I understand, I just sit and breathe and wait for the wave to pass.

Other symptoms come and go with minor notice: migraines, loss of appetite, ringing and buzzing in the ears, the need to commune with nature — watch me randomly pull into a park to put a hand on an especially impressive tree. Weird, I tell ya! But I’m not crazy, I swear. Trust me, I’ve wondered that, but they tell me crazy people don’t think they’re going crazy.

Okay, so I’m not exactly healthy as a horse. In 2007 I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis after complaining of an odd sensation in my feet. They did tests and decided I have the brain plaques that they tie to MS, where the body fights itself. But the MS hasn’t taken me yet. I’m fighting it. My Soul won’t let my Body give in.

Maybe I am crazy, I think the MS is a symptom of awakening!

So, what to do about these symptoms?

Experts remind us that these symptoms might be symptoms of something more severe. Check with your health professional first. Because I had a full check-up, I now know that my palpitations do not have a physical origin, so I can sit it out until the palpitations pass without fear or concern. After all, we should take care of ourselves — this is our only body during this process. Keep it healthy and protected.

Another suggestion is to follow your inner guidance always — if my gut is knotted over something, I follow-up. And, as I continue growing spiritually, I try to clean up my diet. It’s hard, but I’m trying. To control my MS, I take vitamins and have fresh veggies as much as possible. But I’m not perfect. I should go Gluten-free. That’s my next goal. I think eating more naturally and less chemically is crucial as our bodies assimilate into the higher vibrations.

My advice to myself and any who are also feeling the symptoms is to consider treating ascension symptoms holistically. Maybe some Reiki or other hands-on healing would help, as well as natural remedies instead of the harsh medications that many times come with a list of side-effects.

All the heavy, ascension stuff aside, though. Just breathe and ground and love, my friends. I can tell you that what waits for us is amazing. My heart floods with warmth when I consider the possibilities of the coming years. I don’t know how it’s all going to unfold, but judging by the world my teachers wove for me in the dragonfly’s university, it’s going to be worth it.

And remember, Namaste –

I honor the place in you in which the entire universe dwells.

I honor the place in you which is of love, of truth, of light, and of peace.

When you are in that place in you

and I am in that place in me,

we are one.


The Dragonfly’s Student